Do NOT Make New Year’s Resolutions!


Mike’s tradition of personalized ornaments he has been creating for our family since 1983. We have lost or misplaced a few.

It is December 31, 2019. Not, you say! Well, it was when this was being written, although it posted a few days later; today, January 3, 2020. I am settled in comfortably in my PJ’s, so thankful that I have long since let go of the need to go out partying or even to go out to dinner on New Year’s Eve. I have not decided if I will stay up to ring the New Year in, but probably not, for I am sleepy already, and midnight is three hours away! But before I turn in, I want to write a few of my thoughts before the clock turns to the New Year.

I do not know if 2020 is the beginning of a new decade or the end of one, for that is a subject of great debate! But what is not up for debate is the fact that January 1, 2020, is the beginning of a new year, and you, like me, may be asking, how could it be? How could another year have passed so quickly? I do not have a good answer to that question, for it is my question as well.  I think it is a sign of aging to lament about how fast time is passing, and I qualify.

You, like me, are likely thinking about what changes you want to make in the new year. Many call these changes, resolutions. Some of you have made New Year’s Resolutions. But not me. Years ago, I changed my thinking on resolutions, recognizing that for so many people New Year’s resolutions are temporary thoughts that do not translate to real and lasting change. I have a different plan, one that has worked for me. Instead of resolutions, I make commitments. This is not a game of semantics. There is a real difference in commitments and resolutions. Just think of saying, “I resolve,” compared to “I commit.” Do you hear the difference?


Found today when cleaning out a cabinet. I have no idea of the date I received it, but like all truth, it is timeless.

What do you want to commit to in 2020? How did you do with your commitments in 2019? I made real and (hopefully) lasting change in two key areas. I stopped drinking alcohol on May 7, 2019, and on that same day, I got serious about losing weight. On January 3, 2019, I weighed 156 pounds, which is a lot of weight on my 5’ (really less, since I have shrunk; I am now 4’11.5”!) frame. Today, I weigh 110 pounds. I credit stopping drinking for some of that and being committed to WW (which is still Weight Watchers to me!) for the rest of it.

Now for the harder part; keeping the weight off. I have done this before, losing weight, although I have not lost this much weight, ever. As for the drinking, I am even prouder of that than the weight loss. I was a social (usually daily) drinker. Wine, (Chardonnay), was my drink of choice, although I had an occasional Appletini and Lemon Drop Martini. I miss the social part of drinking, especially when I am with others at events who are drinking, and I am drinking tea or diet coke. But there is so much that I do not miss about drinking, and that is the subject of its own blog. I am humbled by my ability to stay committed to my weight loss journey, and my decision to forgo alcohol. These commitments go with me into this new year.


This sign in one of our frequent eateries does not apply to me!

My new commitment for 2020 is to manage my money. For too many years money has managed me, right into too much debt and not enough money. I commit to myself to change that dynamic this year. I am not sure how best to do this, but my commitment is so strong that I know the plan will evolve as I make necessary changes.


I had no idea when I published this book (available on Amazon) in 2018 how profound my changes would be. I just trusted the process!

I am thankful for good health, a loving family and a resolve to keep Changing Me From the Inside Out. May January 2021 find me faithful in keeping my commitments, and you as well.

May this New Year be a blessed one for you.

Patti name

About Patti Fralix

Patti Fralix inspires positive change in work, life, and family through Speaking, Consulting, and Coaching in three specialty areas: Leadership, Managing Differences, and Customer Service. Her leadership firm, The Fralix Group, Inc., has been helping clients achieve practical and tangible results for twenty-two years.
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