These are difficult times, to say the least. I do not need to reiterate the obvious, since we have all been living with the Pandemic for several months. And soon things are about to get worse, some think. School is starting in various degrees in different parts of the country, and parents are worried. I think we all need to be aware of the need to do our very best during these times to stay calm, insulate our hot buttons, and be the stability our children need and deserve.
If you are a parent of dependent children, as much as you love them, you are likely more than over it at this point. You have been responsible for your children’s academic work for several months, as well as their entertainment. Nerves are on edge. It is easy to lose control of our own behavior. Whatever we need to do to remain in control of our own behavior, should be our priority. Children need strength, tolerance, and understanding more now than during normal times.
Children get their sense of stability and security from the important adults in their life, especially their parents. As difficult as these times may be for you, financially and in other ways, if you are a parent, your children take their lead from you. Granted, these are very difficult times for many parents. Make sure that you are a steady force for your children at this time when so much of their world is shifting around them. Keep your wits about you and be the rock your children need and deserve.
OK, you say, “I get it.” But you might also say, “What do I do if I feel I may get out of control?” First and foremost, if/when you feel you may lose control, do not say or do anything immediately. First, breathe deeply and calm yourself down. If you need to, walk away, taking a physical break from the situation. Be in control of yourself. Nothing you could say or do when you have lost control is worth the risk.
Also, ask for help from others if you need it. That can be a spouse (who you should not have to ask for help!), a parent, if they are physically present, and/or a friend. While it is difficult for many people to ask others for help, most people are more than willing to help us when they know we need it. It takes emotional strength and courage to admit that we need help and to ask for help from others.
There have been several social media posts about the importance of parents remaining a steady and calm influence for their children during these times. It is said that this is more important than any academic work involved.
Hopefully the need to continue to protect ourselves and others physically from the Coronavirus is a given. Being the positive and steady force our children need should be considered just as important.
Great post my friend. Children need loving parents always, but especially when so much has happened to cause fear. Sending love to you and your beautiful grands!
Thank you so much, dear friend. Having Virginia this week and seeing how sensitive she is to all that is going on, not frightened, but sensitive, makes my heart hurt for the children dealing with this Covid pandemic. And now, an impending hurricane! We are really living in uncertain times, and children get their stability from the adults in their life, especially their parents. And so many parents are struggling financially, emotionally, and otherwise. It is not easy to be a parent anytime, but especially now.